To A Louse, On Seeing One On A Lady's Bonnet, At Church

      Ha! whaur ye gaun, ye crowlin ferlie?      Your impudence protects you sairly;      I canna say but ye strunt rarely,      Owre gauze and lace;      Tho', faith! I fear ye dine but sparely      On sic a place.       Ye ugly, creepin, blastit wonner,      Detested, shunn'd by saunt an' sinner,      How daur ye set your fit upon her-      Sae fine a lady?      Gae somewhere else and seek your dinner      On some poor body.       Swith! in some beggar's haffet squattle;      There ye may creep, and sprawl, and sprattle,      Wi' ither kindred, jumping cattle,      In shoals and nations;      Whaur horn nor bane ne'er daur unsettle      Your thick plantations.       Now haud you there, ye're out o' sight,      Below the fatt'rels, snug and tight;      Na, faith ye yet! ye'll no be right,      Till ye've got on it-      The verra tapmost, tow'rin height      O' Miss' bonnet.       My sooth! right bauld ye set your nose out,      As plump an' grey as ony groset:      O for some rank, mercurial rozet,      Or fell, red smeddum,      I'd gie you sic a hearty dose o't,      Wad dress your droddum.       I wad na been surpris'd to spy      You on an auld wife's flainen toy;      Or aiblins some bit dubbie boy,      On's wyliecoat;      But Miss' fine Lunardi! fye!      How daur ye do't?       O Jeany, dinna toss your head,      An' set your beauties a' abread!      Ye little ken what cursed speed      The blastie's makin:      Thae winks an' finger-ends, I dread,      Are notice takin.       O wad some Power the giftie gie us      To see oursels as ithers see us!      It wad frae mony a blunder free us,      An' foolish notion:      What airs in dress an' gait wad lea'e us,      An' ev'n devotion!