William Shakespeare: The Tempest, Act III, Scene II
Enter Caliban, Stephano, and Trinculo
Tell not me; when the butt is out, we will drink water; not a drop before: therefore bear up, and board 'em. Servant-monster, drink to me.
Servant-monster! the folly of this island! They say there's but five upon this isle: we are three of them; if th' other two be brained like us, the state totters.
Where should they be set else? he were a brave monster indeed, if they were set in his tail.
My man-monster hath drown'd his tongue in sack: for my part, the sea cannot drown me; I swam, ere I could recover the shore, five and thirty leagues off and on. By this light, thou shalt be my lieutenant, monster, or my standard.
Thou liest, most ignorant monster: I am in case to justle a constable. Why, thou deboshed fish thou, was there ever man a coward that hath drunk so much sack as I to-day? Wilt thou tell a monstrous lie, being but half a fish and half a monster?
Trinculo, keep a good tongue in your head: if you prove a mutineer,—the next tree! The poor monster's my subject and he shall not suffer indignity.
I thank my noble lord. Wilt thou be pleased to hearken once again to the suit I made to thee?
Enter Ariel, invisible
As I told thee before, I am subject to a tyrant, a sorcerer, that by his cunning hath cheated me of the island.
Thou liest, thou jesting monkey, thou: I would my valiant master would destroy thee! I do not lie.
Trinculo, if you trouble him any more in's tale, by this hand, I will supplant some of your teeth.
I say, by sorcery he got this isle; From me he got it. if thy greatness will Revenge it on him,—for I know thou darest, But this thing dare not,—
What a pied ninny's this! Thou scurvy patch! I do beseech thy greatness, give him blows And take his bottle from him: when that's gone He shall drink nought but brine; for I'll not show him Where the quick freshes are.
Trinculo, run into no further danger: interrupt the monster one word further, and, by this hand, I'll turn my mercy out o' doors and make a stock-fish of thee.
I did not give the lie. Out o' your wits and bearing too? A pox o' your bottle! this can sack and drinking do. A murrain on your monster, and the devil take your fingers!
Why, as I told thee, 'tis a custom with him, I' th' afternoon to sleep: there thou mayst brain him, Having first seized his books, or with a log Batter his skull, or paunch him with a stake, Or cut his wezand with thy knife. Remember First to possess his books; for without them He's but a sot, as I am, nor hath not One spirit to command: they all do hate him As rootedly as I. Burn but his books. He has brave utensils,—for so he calls them— Which when he has a house, he'll deck withal And that most deeply to consider is The beauty of his daughter; he himself Calls her a nonpareil: I never saw a woman, But only Sycorax my dam and she; But she as far surpasseth Sycorax As great'st does least.
Monster, I will kill this man: his daughter and I will be king and queen—save our graces!—and Trinculo and thyself shall be viceroys. Dost thou like the plot, Trinculo?
Give me thy hand: I am sorry I beat thee; but, while thou livest, keep a good tongue in thy head.
Thou makest me merry; I am full of pleasure: Let us be jocund: will you troll the catch You taught me but while-ere?
At thy request, monster, I will do reason, any reason. Come on, Trinculo, let us sing.
Flout 'em and scout 'em And scout 'em and flout 'em Thought is free.
Ariel plays the tune on a tabour and pipe
If thou beest a man, show thyself in thy likeness: if thou beest a devil, take't as thou list.
Be not afeard; the isle is full of noises, Sounds and sweet airs, that give delight and hurt not. Sometimes a thousand twangling instruments Will hum about mine ears, and sometime voices That, if I then had waked after long sleep, Will make me sleep again: and then, in dreaming, The clouds methought would open and show riches Ready to drop upon me that, when I waked, I cried to dream again.